I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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