What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Gay?
German.
Pity.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
