week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
