So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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