We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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