this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
