Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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