Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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