32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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