We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
