Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Floor bacon is actually really good
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
