We got so high we made milksteak
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
The convent might be a nice break from real life
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
