he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
