my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
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