I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize