Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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