Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
