i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Randomize
