So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
