i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
