you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
