So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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