This girl is more easily done than said...
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
