Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
