yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Welp...herpes.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
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