she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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