Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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