I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize