Define "chronic" masturbator.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize