It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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