We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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