and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
