Christians are straight up FREAKS
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
