Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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