hotel room ftw
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
