shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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