FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Farmville is her only friend.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
don't judge my taste in strippers
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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