Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
