I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
