You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
