I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
