weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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