There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
