I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
