He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
