Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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