she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize