Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Randomize
