It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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