This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
she peed on how many people?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
