This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
